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Oh those boys....

The time between receiving our referral call and announcing our referral has only been a few days but it's been so hard to keep it to ourselves.  So. Hard. I wanted to shout it out from the parking lot of Trader Joe's where I received the call but I had to keep it under wraps.  Time to process it all.  Time to make an objective decision. 

It has been especially hard to keep it from the kids. Hello! This is their sister we're talking about. A need-to-know event in their lives.  So, tonight, since we clearly knew little sister would be in our family, we decided to take the kids to a Thai restaurant and make the announcement. 

Picky eater #1 and picky eater #2 are not fans of Thai food so the concession was made to go eat dessert at the Thai restaurant.  We sat down and........ok, hold that thought.........background information necessary: As we have been praying for the little girl that we did not yet know, #2 decided that she needed a nickname.  We suggested lots of different nicknames and the name that stuck was "Sweet Pea".  Our #2 has been calling little girl "Sweet Pea" for a good couple of months now..........back to the story......we sat down at the table, ordered the monster Thai dessert platter and announced, "Boys, we finally know who Sweet Pea is!" 

#2 immediately said, "Is our ice cream really going to be orange?".  #1 said nothing.  Anti-climatic.

We gave the boys more information about little girl. We finally started to get some positive feedback.  Some good questions. 

#2 then starts to complain that he doesn't want his second helping of mango ice cream to be in the same bowl as his first helping.  Something about light yellow mixing with orange.  #1 announces in his ever-so-subtle way, "my glass of WATER was the highlight of THIS dessert". And then, "I'd rather eat cottage cheese than eat in another Thai restaurant." Oh boys.

Husband and I drove home smiling.

!!!! Referral Post !!!!

I'm so excited to announce that we have accepted a referral for a little girl!  She just had her first birthday, is cute as a button and is the perfect fit for our family!  We are THRILLED! 

What now? Grab the family, climb on the first plane to Bangkok and bring our little girl home? Ah... wish it were that simple.  It will probably be close to a year before we get to travel to Thailand to meet little girl and bring her home.  Our adoption agency has made our match but the Thai government has to approve the match (called "First Approval").  The first approval wait is running extra long right now hence families are waiting extra long to travel. 

No need to dwell on the wait right now though.  Now is a time to celebrate.  Now is a time to dwell on the fact that we not only have a #1 and a #2 (see my "Da Boys" post if you are confused)...now we have a #3!  Little girl, we feel beyond blessed to add you to our family!

Progress....

I've talked with a couple of friends this past week who have tactfully reminded me that our blog is a little scant on new information so here we go.....

I think I've mentioned that referrals come quarterly.......March, June, September, December.  The June referrals were very delayed....we're talkin' end of July.  There were five little kiddos referred for adoption bringing our wait list number to four.  Four. That's FOUR,  people!  Wow how we've progressed on this list! 

It is now October and the September referrals have not been announced.  I called our agency today to ask about the delay and they said that Thailand has yet to send them the names and profiles of the children available for adoption.  So, it's back to the waiting game.  From the start, we were told that waiting would be a challenging part of this process.  I can assure you it is. 

There is a possibility we could receive a referral in this next referral group.  Our agency puts careful thought into which families would best meet the needs of the children they have been asked to place with US families.  So, although I put a lot of stock into this precious number we are on the wait list, an appropriate match means more to our agency then our wait list number....as it should!  If our little sweetie is not part of this upcoming referral group, I'm fairly sure we'll know who she is in December. 

Keep reading (and I'll keep updating)!

Preparation...

So, what are we doing while we wait for our referral?  We want to be as prepared as possible to parent our new little person so we've taken some steps to gain information.   I'm a part of a couple of Yahoo! groups.....one group is an IA (international adoption) agency research/ethics information board and the other is a group for parents of adoptive children to discuss topics pertinent to adoption.  These posts fill my email inbox daily but contain some highly important info....both for now and when our kiddo comes home.

I'm also doing a fair amount of reading.  I just finished an IA memoir a man in his twenties wrote about his experience discovering the origins of his four adopted siblings.....funny, truthful, heartwarming and a little unsettling.  I plan to read "Toddler Adoption" in the near future since our little girl will be mostly likely be in that age-range when she comes home.   With my highlighter (so we know this book is important folks!), I'm in the process of reading "The Connected Child" by K.Purvis.  This book seems to be THE resource for parenting children from "hard" places.  There are gems on every page.....not only for parenting adopted kids but for parenting my boys too. I'm getting some extra good hints in the "managing behavior" department (I can always use help here).  In fact, I thought of the author today when the boys were yelling and kicking one another in the backseat of my car.  What would Ms. Purvis have suggested?  I don't think she would have cranked the car radio volume to drown out the noise :)  

Prayer has also been a big part of our preparation.  Seems like the topic of adoption is consuming my conversations with God. There are so many ways in which I need His intercession (which could be a whole other blog post). 

Would love to write more but this girl is up way past her bedtime and needs to get some sleep! The boys have not gotten the memo that summer = sleeping past 7:00  ~sigh.....

Some happenings on the adoption front...

I haven't yet mention the Thailand adoptive family Facebook group, have I?  Well, well, it has been a wonderful way to learn more specifics about adopting from Thailand....and a great way to connect with other families who are either in process or already have their Thai kiddos home.  Since Thailand has a small adoption program, there are few US families with Thai children.....BUT....surprisingly, there are quite a few couples from our neck of the woods that are currently in process or have their kids home.  So, a couple from the local group let 6-7 families invade their lovely home last weekend so A. we could celebrate Songkran (the Thai New Year) and B. to meet each other out of the realm of cyberspace.  It was fabulous....people who we would like to know whether we had the Thailand connection or not :)  We have good intentions of planning future get-togethers!

In other news, husband and I are considering this coming Saturday Adoption-Saturday.  During the day, we are going to an adoption conference at a local church.  In the evening, we plan to see the movie, Stuck....a documentary about the challenges and triumphs of international adoption. 

Lucky number....

This is our new digit on the waitlist!  Our agency matched six little kiddos with their forever families in March.  The next referral months are June and September.  We are not counting on being matched in June but are hopeful for September.  We can't wait to learn who our little girl is!